quicksummary: Mozart was a genius composer who liked to make fart jokes in his spare time. That other dude was totally jealous of him.
Winnie the Pooh
quicksummary: A little boy named Christopher Robin imagines that his stuffed animals are alive and living in the Hundred Acre Woods. Every character is an annoying little shit except for Rabbit who just wants everyone to leave him alone so he can grow vegetables in a garden.
quicksummary: Final Destination: People cheat death but Death comes back to finish the job. Final Destination 2: People cheat death but Death comes back to finish the job. Final Destination 3: People cheat death but Death comes back to finish the job. Final Destination 4: People cheat death but Death comes back to finish the job. Final Destination 5: People cheat death but Death comes back...
quicksummary: Morgan Freeman is God (of course), then Jim Carrey is God but he fucks it up (of course), so Morgan Freeman becomes God again.
quicksummary: A young girl’s hormonal choice between necrophilia and bestiality. (boozledorf)
Taylor Swift (All Albums)
quicksummary: The guy dumped her. (justalittlepixie)
School of Rock
quicksummary: Jack Black is a terrible musician and he cons a bunch of fifth graders into not only believing this isn’t true but also sacrificing a year of their precious education in order to listen to his jackassery. (blogsaretough)
(500) Days of Summer
quicksummary: A chronologically challenged person made a movie about hipsters in love. Or not, as the case may be. (theryanlinn)
quicksummary: A two-hour-long Daft Punk music video, featuring Jeff Bridges fighting Jeff Bridges on a bridge. (thelaughingcrow)
RENT by Jonathan Larson
quicksummary: New Yorkers get AIDS, sing about it, and then the genderqueer one dies.
Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare
quicksummary: The Montagues and Capulets hate each other but their kids really wanna smang so they run off and get married but end up killing themselves because they’re idiots.
Oedipus Rex by Sophocles
quicksummary: Oedipus fucks his mom. Woops.